English will be official language of the EU

The place for no astro chat, banter and jokes, your local pub, but online.

English will be official language of the EU

Postby EckyH » Tue Jan 28, 2014 11:49 am

The European Commission has just announced an agreement that English
will be the official language of the EU - rather than German (the other
possibility). As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government
conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement, and has
accepted a 5-year phase-in of new rules which would apply to the
language and reclassify it as EuroEnglish.

The agreed plan is as follows:

In year 1, the soft 'c' would be replaced by 's'. Sertainly, this will
make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard 'c' will be replaced
by 'k'. This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan now have one
less letter.

There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the
troublesome 'ph' is replaced by 'f'. This will reduse 'fotograf' by
20%.

In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted
to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters, which have
always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the
horible mes of the silent 'e's in the language is disgrasful and they
should eliminat them.
By year 4, peopl wil be reseptiv to lingwistik korektions such as
replasing 'th' with 'z' and 'w' with 'v' (saving mor keyboard spas).

During ze fifz year, ze unesesary 'o' kan be dropd from vords
kontaining 'ou' and similar changes vud of kors be applid to ozer kombinations of
leters.

After zis fifz year, ve vil hav a reli sensibil riten styl. Zer vil be
no mor trubls or difikultis and evrirun vil find it ezi to understand
ech ozer.... ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!! VE VIL AL SPIK LIK GERMANS!!

E.

Hi, you are viewing as a guest, You can only see this first post in this topic. if you sign up you get access to other goodies you can't even see as a guest, including video tutorials on imaging and processing, scope modifications and even member discounts on gear!

So, give us a try, what have you got to lose! Oh, and if you stay, when you reach 50 posts you get access to MORE goodies! What are you waiting for!

User avatar
EckyH
Red Giant
 
Posts: 426
Joined: Tue Aug 20, 2013 10:22 am
Location: Münster, Germany

Re: English will be official language of the EU

Postby swag72 » Tue Jan 28, 2014 12:36 pm

User avatar
swag72
Black Dwarf
 
Posts: 2580
Joined: Tue Jan 10, 2012 9:12 pm

Re: English will be official language of the EU

Postby Innkeeper » Tue Jan 28, 2014 1:02 pm

User avatar
Innkeeper
Planetary Nebula
 
Posts: 745
Joined: Sat Mar 26, 2011 8:59 am
Location: sutherland

Re: English will be official language of the EU

Postby Gedan » Tue Jan 28, 2014 3:22 pm

User avatar
Gedan
Black Dwarf
 
Posts: 2284
Joined: Sun Jan 20, 2013 7:35 pm
Location: Lanark

Re: English will be official language of the EU

Postby Knobby » Tue Jan 28, 2014 4:31 pm

Knobby
Protostar
 
Posts: 133
Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2012 7:11 pm

Re: English will be official language of the EU

Postby Dave Smith » Tue Jan 28, 2014 5:10 pm

User avatar
Dave Smith
Black Dwarf
 
Posts: 2749
Joined: Sat Oct 08, 2011 7:11 pm
Location: Maldon Essex

Re: English will be official language of the EU

Postby smerral » Tue Jan 28, 2014 7:47 pm

User avatar
smerral
Black Dwarf
 
Posts: 7687
Joined: Tue Oct 19, 2010 8:33 am
Location: Caithness, Scottish Highlands

Re: English will be official language of the EU

Postby pixelsaurus » Thu Sep 03, 2015 8:20 pm

User avatar
pixelsaurus
Red Giant
 
Posts: 400
Joined: Sun Jul 08, 2012 2:12 pm
Location: New Zealand

Re: English will be official language of the EU

Postby Nightspore » Thu Sep 03, 2015 11:12 pm

User avatar
Nightspore
Planetary Nebula
 
Posts: 701
Joined: Mon Jul 15, 2013 7:05 pm

Re: English will be official language of the EU

Postby Bill55 » Fri Sep 04, 2015 7:51 am

Bill55
Nebula
 
Posts: 45
Joined: Sat Aug 30, 2014 11:00 am


Return to NON ASTRO LOUNGE

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests

cron